India 2013

Happy Indian Triangle

EXEC SUMMARY: The last time I travelled in a kamikaze triangle constellation (mom-wife-me), it ended with some casualties. I am happy to report that despite even a more challenging destination, this time, it was fabulous: wedding extravaganza in Mumbai, furniture and marble shopping in Jodhpur, lecturing at Rajastan University, trekking in Himalayas but most importantly hanging out with my fantastic Indian classmates Vikram, Madukar & Kiran who made this trip unforgettable.

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WEDDING EXTRAVAGANZA: The key reason for my 4^th return to India was a wedding of my classmate Abishek in Mumbai. I had to previously decline invitations to 2 Indian weddings due to McKinsey slavery and I only wept after I saw the wedding photos. Glad the 3rd time was truly lucky time. The wedding was an unforgettable 3-day extravaganza full of dancing and spiritual ceremonies, amazing food and partying. I also noticed couple differences vs. Slovak weddings. To blackmail money from the groom in India, they steal his shoes. In Slovakia, we go for sure and steal his bride. In Slovakia no alcohol = no wedding.  It is almost unthinkable that in India, all the crazy dancing combinations until the sweat drips on the floor happened without a drop of alcohol.

RAJASTANI OVEN: If you think it gets hot in Europe, try summer in Rajastan. With temperatures of 45-50 C, getting out of an air-conditioned room reminds opening a hot oven door when baking. The tanning is also happening at solarium speed. Without 50 sunblock factor and drinking 5 liters of water a day, we would easily end up like European meat jerkies ;) 

TRAFFIC ANARCHY: Over 3000km around India in a car were never too boring. Just a gear-shifting style with throwing in a gear 3 in manual gearbox and then using it conveniently as automat thereafter was quite innovative. Also, despite my significant experience with unthinkable driving situations, India will take it always at least a notch further. Suicidal drivers on every corner, herd of cows suddenly crossing 4-lane highway or driving in opposite direction on motorway and flashing lights – just to make it more fun. However, the Darwin’s Award goes to a motorbike rider with his face totally covered by a scarf. When you really think about it though, closing your eyes might be the best way to get through this traffic anarchy ;)

LECTURING LIKE A MOVIE STAR: Thanks to my Harvard friend Madukar who is a big-banana city official and also vice chancellor of Rajastan University with over 1 million daily students, I had a pleasure to give speech on “How to Boost Your Talent” to inquisitive students and faculty. What I thought would be an informal discussion turned out to be a major event. When I got out of a car in my sweaty u-tshirt, shorts and sandals, I was blinded by all the camera flashes, flower bouquets and a mass of people including journalists sword fighting with microphones - a scene that best reminded red-carpet Oscar Awards ceremony. Fortunately, it took me about 0.6 seconds to slam the door, change inside the car and have a 2nd run on giving my 1st impression. We felt like movie stars not only on the lecture. Other than often having police protection from Madukar, we were asked for pictures several times a day with exhaustive photo sessions at major sights like Taj Mahal or Gate of India.

INDIAN IDIOSYNCRASIES: Although Indian people are one of the nicest in the world, they are sometimes difficult to understand. Firstly, their “∞“ head movements which would imply “no” elsewhere mean “yes” in this country of endless possibilities. In a similar fashion, red streetlight does not necessarily mean “stop”.  With a strike of originality, Indian time zones do not shift in full hours.  Delhi, for example, has 4.5 hour time difference to London. Lastly, garbage and littering is considered just a part of everyday life, a fact that many foreigners (including us) have major difficulty to digest. We even dedicated one afternoon to cleaning surroundings in Himalayas, but I believe it would require an afternoon from every single person in India to make a real difference. 

SHOPPING MANIA: 

Although I have always been an obsessive shopper when on travels, this time it took yet another level. Initially, my shopping mania was hitting airline luggage weight and car-trunk volume limitations. This time,
lured by the beauty and rock-bottom prices, my friend Raj is helping us to ship whole container of various goodies ranging from antique furniture to stunning marble - all for our new house that we are building in Bratislava. However, if traffic anarchy suggests anything about the way logistic companies operate here, rather than shopping, this should be probably called gambling ;)

Dubai, Maldives, Sri Lanka and Israel

EXEC SUMMARY

We were lucky to do refreshing 3 weeks of traveling to Dubai, Maldives, Sri Lanka and Israel in April. Every time I take on these trips, I realize how inspiring, energizing and perspective-changing they are - whether it was bathing with elefants in Sri Lanka, riding sand dunes of Dubai, night swimming at Maldives or strolling through ancient Jerusalem. What made this trip very diverse were not only destinations but also the fact that about half of it was leisure and half business. 

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BATHING WITH ELEFANTS IN SRI LANKA: Sri Lanka felt a bit like a cleaner and less disorganized India. Still some things were definitely worth visiting - strolling through Buddhist temples, bathing with elephants, matching familiar names to plants on spice tours or bumping into a village car race where brutal sound and looks are significantly more important than speed. A lot is written on child or animal abuse around the world, but little is known about severe van abuse in Asia. On the way to tea-plantations highlands, our seemingly peaceful driver was indulging in a morbid high-gear low-rotation torture of his innocent manual-shift Toyota van. After 5 hours of this severe abuse, and a couple rounds of car pushing, our Toyota finally passed away and we got a replacement car. But witnessing how a new driver enjoys exactly the same driving style, I am now convinced Sri Lanka runs a prestigious nationwide driving competition for lowest-rotation at the highest possible gear. I can personally confirm a noticeable achievement of driving 5th gear at 25km/h while on about 12% uphill road. 


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RIDING SAND DUNES OF DUBAI: Although often called Hong-Kong of middle east, Dubai could not be more different. While it is quite impressive on one hand, I found it also a bit perverse - likely due to its consumerism and not-exactly-negligible carbon footprint. It was built in the middle of desert around 3Ts - Trade, Transportation & Turism with impressive vision of Sheikhs. Many things are worth seeing - Dubai mall, the largest and likely the most posh mall in the world including full-size ice hockey stadium or Guinness-record aquarium with 400 sharks and rays, the tallest building Burj Khalifa (808m) next which surrounding skyscrapers look like zemlyankas, ridiculous artificial ski slope, opulent gold souk market or man-made palm archipelago. Our stay in Bab Al Shams desert spa resort 100km out of Dubai where I came for Google meeting felt a bit like being part of decadent medieval caravan indulging in a remote oasis. Maniac Landcruiser drivers on sand dunes quickly brought us back to reality and I was glad to follow precious advise to eat lightly or else this part of the trip woud be even more memorable :)  After a week, we were very ready to move to Maldives.


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ULTIMATE ROMANCE AT MALDIVES: Staying in a water bungalow of Sheraton Full Moon resort at Maldives was all we imagined and more. Turquoise cafe-warm sea where you could float or swim for hours could not be more relaxing. So was exploring underwater world until we met our new friend - hideous corral fish with big eyes and teeth which ignored our initial hints that it is not welcome. Only my furious karate kata with dead corals in hands seemed to surprise our over-enthusiastic friend giving us a chance of fast escape. Otherwise, it is hard to imagine more romantic settings than a sunset at a water bungalow with cooling champagne followed by naked night swimming (only occasionally interrupted by my paranoid thoughts of local baby sharks going wild with my little sea snake).

FROM ACIENT JERUSALEM TO HIGH-TECH TEL AVIV: Israel has been the biggest surprise of the whole trip. While I expected second Dubai, Tel Aviv felt more like Cairo at the first sight. One thing that strikes you right away is that Israelis did not exactly master Japanese politeness and can often be a bit too direct or abrupt. Authors of Startup Nation, a book about Israeli economic success suggest that this assertive/direct/arrogant characteristic of Israelis as well as their cohesiveness resulting from constant war threats are the key drivers of their success. Certainly, number of successful tech/trade companies that originated from this 7-million nation surpasses wildest expectations. It was fascinating to hear behind-Google-scene insights and tips which we will attempt to reapply in Slovakia to boost tech export and startups. Unlike modern Tel Aviv, Jerusalem is a strikingly unique ancient place with very different life in each of the four Arab/Jewish/Christian/Armenian  quarters. Yet, it must be tough to live in never-ending fear of war and terrorists. One morning I had to leave hotel through emergency exit due to bomb attack and flying out from Tel Aviv airport was as painful as Google hiring process; the young female soldiers were more inquisitive during exit interviews than my ex-girlfriend after I returned from Moscow business trip.

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Americas in 71 days - Argentina & Brazil

Last Argentinean Tango and Brazilian Work-out

Exec Summary

Argentina and Brazil were a highly pleasant finish to our trip around Caribbean and South America. Choking on out-of-this-world steaks and dancing tango in Buenos Aires, working out on Copacabana beach in Rio, feeding South American coatis under beautiful Iguazu waterfalls or exploring finest beaches of Brazil with my classmate Felipe. We will be back! ;)

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Piazzolla Tango
Buenos Aires breathes tango - whether on streets or in dedicated theatre shows. After posing with street tango dancers, we saw the most fantastic and very-local tango show called after my favorite composer Astor Piazzolla. In the end, Klara was "luckily" picked by one of the dance stars to dance a tango with him on a stage. Don't know whether it was her fear of total humiliation or yet-undiscovered genius, but she ended up coming up with pretty creative steps making her look like she was dancing tango since early childhood. At least to a total layman like me, I was speechless... ;)

Tarantino Car Ride

We have done quite a solid logistical job on this trip. Other than about 20 flights, we have also set a new personal record by a 40-hour bus trip from Bolivia to Argentina. Not far into Argentina, we were supposed to change buses with only 30-minute time gap. After being through bunjee jumping, ski diving, and Peruvian death-road trip, I would never believe this will turn into the craziest adrenaline experience of my life. The whole setup was uncomfortably strange. After arrival, were picked up by a guy who could easily be a part-time drug dealer. After losing 15 minutes by wondering around and messy conversation, he called a car connection. A guy from Tarantino movie showed up in a wrack. It took us a while to decide whether we get in or not. Once in the car, I started to doubt if was the right decision. I mean our Tarantino guy again barely got off the phone, the car was a major mess and he just entered the most dubious industrial parts of the city. Our pathetic Spanish only added confusion. Once I realized the back doors and windows were locked, I started to think about the fastest way to break the guy's neck before he drives us into an industrial backyard full of his amigos with magnums and kalashnikovs. Fortunately, before I managed to finish my thought-through plan, he found the bus and we soon safely arrived to Buenos AIres.  Checking my pants in the evening, I remembered my good friend's words: "the worst death is from being scared".

Steak Equation
We were super lucky that my classmate Nori sent us to what is allegedly the best steak house in Buenos Aires - Cabana Las Lilas. We tried a local T-bone and Japanese Kobe steak. Until this day, I was convinced that picanha is the best, but after tasting Kobe steak, I established Rasto's steak equation "kobe steak = picanha^2" When I tried it, the outside world has shut down and all I could feel was Kobe's out-of-this-world taste. Supposedly, Kobe steaks comes from cows who are fed beer and get daily massages to maximize tenderness of the meat. You almost want to believe it to justify the hefty price of close to $100 per piece.

Hunting Shemales

My classmate Felipe and his lovely wife Karen did such a fantastic job of hosting us in Florianopolis we thought we will never leave. Just during our stay, Karen who is a moderator of evening TV show, did a research on shemales.  One evening, we went for a car ride like FBI agents to the darkest corners of Florianopolis. We investigated price/service offer  and did about 10 rounds around the block as we could not get a good photo of them. Even somewhat retarded pimp would realize something stinks here. Thus other than wondering how come these hotties are really males, I could not stop thinking when their pimps starts chasing us while shooting at the back window. I guess I should have watched fewer action movies on the flight here. ;)

Brazilian Body Culture

Other than surprised how economically developed Brazil is, it also struck us how much Brazilian care about their health and bodies. When you wonder around Copacabana or Ipanema beaches in Rio on the weekend, what appears like a triathlon race is just usual weekend workout. Hundreds of people - many with amazing bodies - running and on bikes or just working out in a public beach gym. It makes some sense as the dresses and swimming suits, especially on Brazilian girls, are often ridiculously scarce. On a sidetone, although I found Brazilian ladies the hottest, Argentinean girls get the prize for the most beautiful of the countries we have seen in Latin America. 

Americas in 71 days - Bolivia

Endless Surreal Faces of Bolivia

Exec Summary

Bolivia which reminds anything from Mongolia in Latin-American setting to Salvator Dali’s paintings was the biggest surprise of our trip. Despite spending only a week here, we have managed to party with locals in La Paz, race downhill on Death Road, jump like bunnies on the largest salt flats in the world, gaze at lakes of surreal colors, run between gasping geysers and bath in natural hot springs with breathtaking views – and not only because of the altitude of ~4,000m (13,000 ft) ;)

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Death Road Madness

One of the biggest attractions around La Paz is mountain-bike downhill on Death Road. Our bike agency was called “Madness” for a good reason. The trips starts at elevation of 4700m (15,000 ft) on snowy mountains and finishes 60km, couple hours, and sometimes couple dead bodies later at 1200m (3500 ft) in a jungle. At its infamous peak, ~400 people died here annually. To raise the stakes, I partied with another crazy Slovak and couple locals until early morning hours the night before. Although we eventually found it safer than our trip to Amazon, this adrenaline ride would probably still qualify as insane for many people. In our book though: Definitely worth it!

Hitting the White Route

Other than being the highest capital in the world at 3,700m (12,000 ft), La Paz has another rarity. A bar called Route 36. Lines here are formed on the table rather in front of the bar. A gram of the white powder can be allegedly bought for as low as $15. It is probably for a reason some call it THE bar of South America. As you can imagine, getting in is not exactly easy - the bar moves around the city. We only listened with a dropped jaw to stories of the fellow travelers who managed to find it ;)

True North

In Bolivia, I decided that the last missing piece for me to qualify as an old sea wolf is a compass. So I installed one promptly on my android. To my surprise, it seamed guys from Google did not get it right this time. When I looked up to the sun, it was always exactly on the north according to the compass instead of south. It took a while and quite a few rounds of diligent step-by-step recalibration, before it struck me that on a southern hemisphere, the things work somewhat differently ;-) 

Americas in 71 days - Peru

Following Inca Trails in Peru

Exec Summary

Peru can get very touristic. You can witness funny moments where natives on floating Titicaca islands demonstrate chewing stems of giant grass while 30 tourists eagerly snap pictures. Still, there are many good reasons why tourists get here. A day on Machu Picchu was magical as was our trip to Amazon. Sleeping in jungle lodges without electricity while counting seconds between lightning & thunder, drinking from lianas, spotting capybaras, flashing monkeys and annoying alligators were well worth the trip. 

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Bivaking on Buses

We would never thought of remembering Peru for what likely qualifies as the biggest portable fridge in the world. It was our overnight bus to Cuzco. I believe I woke up with a frosting on my face, unsure if I can still move my legs. Although the bus attendant was saying something about broken aircon, the buses here do get ridiculously cold also due to altitude of ~4,000m (~13,000ft). In Latin America, they divide buses into two key groups – camas and semi-camas. You ideally want to pick camas, as their service is often on par with a business-class flight. But sometimes, you simply don’t have a choice. Needless to say, our gear for further overnight bus rides on semi-camas reminded rather bivaking expeditions the civil traveling.

Foursome Incident

On accommodation front, we run extremes. One day we stay in the cheapest hostels often without private bathroom, the next in Sheraton suites waving my platinum club card (a very convenient perk from McKinsey times). While cheap hostel rooms help us truly appreciate 5-star comfort of Sheraton, they do have couple drawbacks - one of them is sound-insulation. Genius architect of our hostel room in Cuzco had an innovative idea of separating the adjacent rooms just via a built-in cupboard. Closing the cupboard doors prevented from basically hearing people breathing nextdoor. One night we came home firmly believing our neighbours left. After several-day starvation, we readily engaged into “related activities” with complementary sound effects. Our late-night performance stopped only after we saw the neighbour’s lights turning on through the open cupboard accompanied by mumbling that did not exactly sound like cheering ;)

Real Death Road

After rubbing elbows with hundreds of tourist on impressive yet a bit crowded Machu Picchu, we wanted to try something off-the-beaten trek. We decided, a trip to Amazon jungle in Manu would do. As usually, my Scottish frugality voted for a 12-hour minibus option over a flight. Our “Death-Road” adrenaline down-hill on mountain bikes in Bolivia turned out to be a breathe compared to this heart-stopping kamikaze drive. The Manu agent clearly forgot to mention minor facts like never-ending landslides, trucks stuck in mud and kilometer-deep abysses decorated by numerous RIP crosses. As a bonus on our way back, the driver who drove the whole previous night was falling asleep exactly in parts with the highest cliffs. As we were not too eager to experiment with bungee jumps without rope, we immediately took several precautions. Other than me almost killing the driver, river bath combined with caffeination and organizing “Eurovision” minibus competition in singing national songs did the trick.

 

Piggy Doggie

On the way to Amazon jungle, we stopped at the house where we found a team of well-synchronized pets. We were greeted by a beautiful yet angry parrot who did not seem to like us interrupting his afternoon siesta - clearly demonstrated by nagging us around the backyard while pinching our shoes. He was followed by a little super-cute wild pig, which acted exactly like a little dog. After vacuuming our feet and turning on his back, demanding belly rubbing, he started to chase cats. Both parties seamed to enjoy this game, though the cats appeared to be caught a bit off-guard once this Pluto started to throw them in the air with his nose.

Americas in 71 days - Galapagos

Galapagos – Back to Nature

Exec Summary

Galapagos islands, the place that inspired Darwin to come up with the evolution theory, is likely going to be the highlight of our 71-day trip. Almost 2 weeks of sailing on a lovely catamaran, exploring stunning islands, diving with seals, sharks and penguins while feeling like a photographer for National Geographic. :)


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Thorough Preservation

Galapagos take your breath away. Before that custom officers take away from your luggage any food that may contain seeds not native to Galapagos. Ecuadorians take protecting Galapagos very seriously and so far they have been quite successful considering 160k visitors last year. They are even eradicating some animals and plants that have been previously introduced here by humans. You quickly learn that almost every other species here is endemic – i.e. only present here. My whole Galapagos experience was dramatically enhanced by insightful commentaries of Klara who is a keen biologist and environmentalist (sometimes almost too keen J)

I Love Boobies
eru - that custom officers take away all your seedsAmerica and US can easily to miss your flight on Friday afternoon. a month a by  

Good chance for this champ :)

Likely not much action ahead :(

To protect my ever balder head J, I bought a hat here that reads “I love boobies”. Though also true, this time, it is not so much about human anatomy but rather biology. Blue-footed boobies are super-cute white-grey birds whose strikingly bright-blue feet demonstrate how well nourished/fit they are. During the mating period, the males are patiently waiting on the ground showing off their blue feet while females fly around and pick. The bluer the feet of a male, the greater his chance to have some action with the girls.

Diving and Meeting the Highness Lonesome George

Diving on Galapagos is one of the best in the world. Not so much for corals which you should rather see in Red Sea or Caribbean, but for the animals. There are not too many places where you can dive into caves with sharks, pet turtles, chase rays or annoy lobsters in one dive. Klara has managed to get her scuba diving license in 2 days and we had a couple unforgettable dives together. We also made friends with owners of a local scuba diving school who took us inland to see giant turtles - some live up to 200 years and weight over 300 kg. We have also seen a local celebrity “Lonesome George” who is the last living member of his turtle tribe – that’s where the “lonesome” comes from. There is likely a good reason why his family is dying out – he is told not to be friendly with anybody except a guy who feeds him for past 20 years. Recently he also got a company of 2 turtle ladies though with not many tangible results yet.

Sailing Again

Despite the challenges of Caribbean sailing I wrote about in the previous blog, Klara charmed me into another one on Galapagos. It turned out to be half the price and at least twice as much fun. Only about 20 people aboard on a lovely catamaran, pretty much everybody international and under 35. We got a nice captain’s cabin, but clearly not everybody was as lucky. A Dutch couple learned a meaning of a term “economic cruise” the hard way. Their cabin leaked the first night during a storm to the point they even tried sleeping in the shower - which – not surprisingly did not work too well. We also met here a crazy German girl who had a talent to become missing after just walking down the beach – because she “did not feel like turning back” she walked for 2 days, drank rain water from leaves and ended up in hospital due to dehydration. However, for all of us, the 5 day sailing around Galapagos islands was stunning – unforgettable landscapes, myriad of animals and 2x daily snorkeling that beats most of dives elsewhere.

Tame Animals

The animals and birds here are so tame that you can take photos almost touching them with your lenses. Interestingly, 30-40 years back, when hunters were still after the seals, visitors had about 5 seconds to take pictures before the seals spotted them and ran away to the sea. It took generations after the hunting seized for seals to get friendly. Apparently, their tameness took on special dimension - the seals now even penetrate towns. They were lying all over the ferry terminal including the benches for passengers when we arrived. Passing became a challenge for several travelers as the seals in a pack became quite territorial. Eventually, a 2m/120kg brave local guy pushed his way through while shouting and waiving his cap heavily, dramatically increasing chances for others to get to their boats.

Spanish Gurus

Unlike most other travelers here, to this date, our Spanish skills are pathetic. Other than learning numbers, we really don’t speak much which sometimes results in somewhat awkward situations. Clearly after couple weeks, Klara has felt that she has picked up the lingo. Last night, to my surprise, she confidently stepped forward to help my struggling conversation with an old hostel owner. After Klara’s “free habitation agreemento” intervention, the lady looked more puzzled than a dear in the headlights. After trying hard for couple more minutes, we eventually capitulated with combination of polite smiles, diligent nodding and “manana” (tomorrow) keyword.

Americas in 71 days - Caribbean

DRIFTING IN CARIBBEAN, RACING IN BOGOTA

Exec Summary

This year, Klara and I are a bit lucky to have 10 weeks for travelling in Americas. Starting with Caribbean through Colombia, Galapagos, Peru, Bolivia, Argentina, Brazil, finishing with Portland, Seattle, NYC and 5-year HBS reunion in Boston. Despite some challenges, our first 2 weeks in Caribbean have been unforgettable - sailing on a two-mast sailboat, staring at stars during nights, fluorescent Bio Bay, and horse riding on the beaches. So far so good. J

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Bio Bay in Puerto Rico

We started our 71 day Latin-American trip with chilling couple days in Puerto Rico. It has a very addictive combination of comfortable US infrastructure coupled with super-relaxed latino style. We did nothing else but sleeping and related activities, enjoying lovely beaches and experimenting with all kinds of fantastic local food and cocktails. 

On day 5, Klara convinced me that we should get out of San Juan’s decadent rhythm. The Kia we rented reminded me of the ad for the latest Volkswagen Beatle “0-100km/h? --- Yes”. Except in this case I would modestly suggest “Maybe” – if you really push it hard. Still, swimming in jungle waterfalls and night kayaking in fluorescent Bio Bay – one of 5 such places in the world – was well worth it. The fluorescent blue-ish light around the paddle or a hand when you move it under water is a result of microorganisms trying to distract their predators. Not sure if effective, but definitely very surreal.

Caribbean Sailing Challenges and Rewards

After our stay in Puerto Rico, we boarded a lovely 2-mast sailboat Arabella together with ~30 people in St. Thomas for a romantic sail around Caribbean islands. To our surprise, the boarding felt like signing up for a  retirement facility in Florida – almost all of our sail-mates were over 60 and Americans – what a combination ;). Apparently, my freshly shaved head, U-tshirt and Eastern-European accent did not make much impression either – I have overheard a puzzled conversation about “who is this Russian mafia guy” J

Then another challenge struck. I figured my body is not exactly friends with bouncy rhythm of the boat. What started as an 18-hour sleep day on day 1 (I later learned one of the sings of sea sickness), culminated with unloading my heavy breakfast in three rounds on day 2 during a storm. Fortunately, lovely snorkeling, horse-riding on beaches, nights we slept outside with unforgettable star views and complimentary Champaign to celebrate Klara’s 30th bday have more than made up for the challenges above.

Racing in Bogota

From Caribbean, we moved to Bogota. The city underperformed my high expectations potentially also due to still feeling dizzy from the sailing. Although we did enjoy a recommended cable car trip to the overlooking Monseratti hill, the highlight of Bogota was our taxi ride to the airport. We were shocked to find out that taxi drivers refuse to go to Aeroporto during Friday afternoon.  We eventually found one good man, who after a good deal persuasion and doubling the fee was willing to go. After we took on the airport direction, we started to understand. The traffic just did not move. I guess similarly to Moscow, Bogota is one of a few cities where you can easily miss your flight despite a generous time plan – especially on Friday afternoon. We caught ours only thanks to Pedro’s knowledge of back streets, Schumacher speed and ridiculously assertive driving skills confirmed with his happy grin after each “victory”.  He showed us a completely new face to so-much underestimated Kia.