CHINESE TRIPLE C
Executive Summary
As you might know, this summer 2005, in 101 days, Ingrid and I are traveling through China, Tibet, Mongolia, Hong Kong, Japan, Thailand, Myanmar, Cambodia and India so I would like to send a couple of updates to let you know the highlights.
China, a fascinating blend of Communism, Confucianism and Capitalism with fantastic cuisine and stunning temples, is a country you have to visit. Though language is certainly a challenge, hardly anywhere else you will witness uniform office exercises on the street, enjoy taste of a snake, see breath-taking Shaolin kung-fu or count thousands of Terracotta warriors.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/China#
Size Disparities
China is huge. Every larger city has more citizens than there are Slovaks in the world. Although people are not particularly sizable, especially in comparison with me, Beijing reminds Moscow with its mania for huge size of everything from roads, buildings to squares. Some taxis are certainly an exception. I felt like the one which we used yesterday qualifies to Guinness Book. This 1.2x0.8m metal "can" is capable of staffing driver and 2 passengers (+ kid if necessary). It is not only the cheapest but also the fastest means of travel passing through the traffic together with motorcycles.
Language Challenges
Combination of Chinese writing and pathetic English language skills create pretty challenging environment even for seasoned travelers. Anybody who can say "hello" or "bye" qualifies as fluent English speaker here.
Food Specialties
It is worth to visit China just for its fantastic cuisine. It feels like in Europe, we play only one or two violins while Chinese food provides a true orchestra concert of tastes. I have also tried everything from snakes to scorpions on a special food market in Beijing. My favorite was grilled grasshopper. I do not think Chinese eat all this, just crazy tourists like me so that they can then boast on their blogs.
Unbeatable Service
In spite of communist impact, China proves once again that Asians are simply unbeatable in service.
Although most public toilets here are a breath-holding test, the experience at Beijing Airport was very different. Just before I walked into a cabin, the service guy cleaned the toilet so meticulously that I could see my reflection and skillfully handcrafted a square cover from a toilet paper on top of it. Though there was already one roll in the cabin, in a moment, he was pushing another one through under the door "Sir, Sir, more paper, more paper". When he heard me unlocking, he rushed to open my door, hand me a paper towel, run water and show me were soap is. All this 5-star service was accompanied by professional smile and gentle bow. It was not only the best ever toilet service I have received, I also believe this Mr. Charmin deserves to be named Entrepreneur of the Year for figuring out how to make money on the job where others never would.
On top, white Caucasians – especially tall or blond get what I would call "national hero" treatment in China. Greetings on the street and requests for group pictures (especially with Ingrid) became routine but some things can still catch me unprepared. In Louyang, each time I entered grocery I got personal female assistant who walked around the store with me, translated all products descriptions, smiled constantly and wondered how tall I am.
Fitness Discipline
I could not stop laughing when at 8am, the whole office of China Bank run out of the building in their uniforms, lined-up and started exercising to the upbeat music. It reminded me our elementary-school fitness exercises during communist era.
As said food is delicious so I try to keep fit here too. Chinese have these simple fitness centers in public parks where I was doing pull-ups one morning and felt pretty good as it seemed I got some interest of several teenage girls. After I finished, a 7-year old boy challenged me to compete with him. I smiled and accepted. Then he swiftly did his 15 repetitions and left in tears both me & my Fan Club.
Talking sports, though a bit disgusting, I have to mention this one. Chinese are world champions in spitting. I was warned about this before we arrived and have to say Beijing did not meet my "high" expectations. However, as we moved west, the expectations were far exceeded. It is not only the spitting but all those sound effects that precede it. Ladies here can be especially impressive. Nobody seems to bother with placing it, whether it is a walkway in a bus or a spot under your table in a restaurant. I already got used to it but you can imagine Ingrid particularly enjoys witnessing this peculiar national sport.
Countless Attractions
Nixon pretty much said it with "It surely is a great wall" when he saw it. Also, I did not count all Terracotta warriors in Xian but there were quite a few of them. Temples in Beijing, Xian and other cities were truly great, but I have to say that, similar to Egypt, we are starting to get Sightseeing Overload Syndrome, so we are cutting down on temples and the like.
When we arrived to Shaolin on Sunday, it looked rather like a shabby laundry camp for kids. However, the next day 5am I realized where we are when roaring of 7000 athletes woke us up. It is unbelievable what those kids can do with their body. We have also seen a show from which a highlight for me was popping balloons with a nail through a glass block. The Speedy Gonzales simply shot a hole through the glass, much like a bullet does, with only a nail in his hand. If you really want, you can also learn all this for 600 USD/months (housing + training fee for foreigners). I myself would not mind.
After a visit in Panda Research Base in Chengdu, I am pretty positive I was panda in my previous life. Its not that (as you surely guessed) they are so adorable, but because I have never seen a more lazy creature in my life.
Shopping Mania
Once again, we proved our obsession with shopping. Among the highlights, I got 5 suits made & bought 3 sets of Chinese porcelain in the first week. The problem this time is that we have to carry it all around Asia for another three months.
7 DAYS IN TIBET
Executive Summary
Tibet, with its average altitude of 4000m/13000ft, is a place where sky is virtually touching the ground. The 7-day jeep trip from Lhasa to Everest Base Camp (5200m/17000ft) was definitely one of the best trips of my life. Listening to chanting in amazing monasteries, staring at magnificent Himalayan panoramas, meeting nomads around stunning Nam-tso lake and getting to a stone-throw distance from Everest were only a few highlights. For the complete Himalayan experience, however, I recommend to take a trip from Nepal to Tibet. While Tibet beats Nepal with its monasteries, music, architecture and panorama-mountain views, in Nepal, you will share your Himalayan experience with only those who were equally willing to undergo the torture of multiple-day strenuous hiking.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/Tibet#
Apart from modest hiking around Mt. Kailash (a mountain in the west Tibet), individual trekking is not allowed and thus not very much practiced in Tibet. The main means of transport for tourists is a four-wheel drive. You can even get to Everest Base Camp from Tibetan side without hiking for more than a few meters. Thus, the people you share your once-in-a-lifetime experience with are quite different in Tibet versus those in Nepal. I personally prefer the latter. However, sitting in a jeep for 7 days on Tibetan bumpy “roads” might be pretty demanding too. Especially if your Landcruiser, which already served over 420,000km, still remembers the first Dalai Lama. If Oxford Dictionary ever looks for a definition of “ass-ache”, I believe this is it.
Where the hell is Everest?
On our trip to Everest Base Camp, whenever we saw a mountain panorama, our driver (who could say only ”Hello” & “Let’s go” in English) would point to the biggest mountain and say “Chomolungma”. When we asked: “and Everest?”, we got no response. As I was an “old dog” in the team, everybody turned to me to clarify this mystery. I confidently explained that the mountain which appears the biggest is Choyu - one of the Himalaya eight-thousand meter mountains - and Chomolungma is most likely its long name. But Everest must be somewhere close as Choyu is only 30km away from it. To make it bullet-proof, I nailed it with my Nepalese learning that Everest is not the highest-appearing mountain because it is most likely further from us. Everybody nodded with acknowledgment. I myself felt Hillary would probably not explain it better. I only realized that Chomolungma is a Tibetan name for Everest after we were so close to it that there was no other mountain around.
Tibetan Talent Pool
In Tibet, talent shows at an early age. We probably met the youngest salesperson and artist ever. The former was maximum 3 year-old and very professional. Each time we refused, he would bring something else with his irresistible “look-e, look-e”. The artist (around 5) was definitely much younger than his instrument. Apart from undisputable musical talent he was also a solid logistic manager. His 3 songs plus tuning were exactly enough for the crowd changeover. Based on my observation he was making around $20/hour which is probably more than the rest of his family makes in a month.
Read Your Guidebook Properly
On the way back from Tibet, I noticed that Chinese city Xian had the highest number of hairdressers per capita so I decided it is time to get my haircut (especially because many of them were quite pretty and warmly inviting me inside). For some reason, they were surprised when I showed that I wish to get a haircut and even more when Ingrid (who was walking a block behind me taking pictures) walked in. It took them more than 15 minutes to get a proper hairdresser. Paradoxically, although I look bald now thanks to her “mastery”, this must be the sexiest haircut I ever got: We learned from Lonely Planet later that small hair-dressing saloons are a cover for ladies offering very different kind of a service.
Bus vs. Train
In Xian, we discovered there are only standing tickets to Shanghai. Though I could not believe it first, I was reassured standing ticket means you have no seat during the 20-hour ride. Understandably, we decided for a backup option – sleeper bus. When we entered the bus, we were asked to take off our shoes. We though to ourselves: “this is going to be something special”. Sure it was. If I called Chinese cuisine an orchestra of tastes, appropriate metaphor for Chinese sleeper bus is a festival of sock smell. It seamed that this particular journey was a too much even for our experienced driver who came to bring us back from coma a few times with a bottle of cheap perfume. We could truly enjoy this experience to the fullest as we ended up with a 9-hour delay.
Friendly advice: if you can choose, go for train. I am writing this message from Chinese “Orient Express” connecting Shanghai & Beijing, the best train I have ever taken beating even majority of my flight experiences.
National Sports #2
Tibetans don’t believe in personal space. Whenever we stopped anywhere close to civilization, people would stare through the car windows or get so close to you when watching the display of your digital camera that you could feel their breath on your neck and without a shadow of a doubt identify their last meal.
Tibetan national sport #2 is definitely pool. Although Namche Bazar (Nepalese gate village to Everest at 3500m) officially boasts with highest-located pool table in the world, we have seen at least 100 pool tables in Tibet at higher elevation. You can play as high as Nam-tso Lake at 4700m. If you are as enthusiastic as Tibetan players, you will not even mind the sticks which are as bumpy as Tibetan roads.
I still have to mention that Chinese national sport #2 (just behind spitting which we learned is ironically illegal) is getting sitting spots in a subway. The best athletes (often as old as 50) will roll over you before you manage to get off, approaching seats with a speed of light. Those who manage to take the seat can be identified by a victorious grin on their face lasting for the rest of the journey.
Shopping Mania #2
Since the last time, when I wondered how we are going to carry all our acquisitions, we doubled our porcelain sets to solid 6 which is now equaling the number of suits (with double # of the trousers). To bring it home safely, we also bought two sizable ”Gucci” bags and about 30 pieces of underwear for padding. I guess Slovak national sport must be shopping…
MONGOLIA FROM SADDLE
Executive Summary
Mongolia, a nomadic country without fences, is truly unique. On top, it is so gorgeous it would be a waste of time trying to describe it in words. Even our pictures cannot fully capture its magnificence. You simply have to come and explore. During our 9-day jeep/horse/camel trip from Ulaanbaatar to Gobi Desert, we covered everything from sipping Airag in traditional ger tents, walking in ice valleys, riding horses and camels in canyons and arid plateaus to climbing sand dunes. Although the beginnings were tough, we can ride horses like cowboys now. ;)
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/Mongolia#
Deep Throat
Right on the first night, we visited an impressive Mongolian cultural performance in Ulaanbaatar. Besides snake-like acrobats who proved to have no bones, the highlight of the show was khoomi or “deep throat”. To my surprise, in Mongolia, deep throat is a special style of singing from larynx, throat and stomach which produces two tones at the same time. Although I have to admit it is very intriguing, female singers can be so loud you wish you brought earplugs.
Mongolian Saddle
One of my key objectives for Mongolia was to learn how to ride a horse. Thus, we started already on the second day – to adjust a bit. Other than I was bigger than the horse (Mongolian horses are smaller than European ones), everything seemed to be OK. But riding a horse only once before coming to Mongolia, I was not really an expert. After half an hour of riding, I started to feel traditional Mongolian wooden saddle padded with just a thin piece of leather is not exactly the best company for my bottom. However, we were here to adjust, so I kept adjusting. One hour later, I could barely stay the pain. Unfortunately, we paid for 4 hours so I dragged on for another half an hour to use up my free minutes. Forgive me my inexperience in the last update, when I connected definition of “ass-ache” to Tibetan roads. That was barely a silky fingertip massage compared to Mongolian saddle. Half-standing during the jeep ride home, I knew I had a problem.
At home, after inspection of the results in a mirror, I decided for a radical step. We opened our first-aid kit and Ingrid applied iodine tincture on the afflicted area. It probably helped but our neighbors five floors above could testify that my simultaneous vocal performance definitely beaten even the loudest deep-throat singers from the night before.
Airag
Forget all you know about Mongolian barbecue restaurants, you simply do not come to Mongolia for food. One item which is worth mentioning though is wide-spread Mongolian national drink Airag - fermented mare (horse) milk with alcohol content of 3-4%. It tastes a bit like Slovak “zincica” but is much stronger. - I guess, especially non-Slovaks must have a perfect picture now. ;-) If I attached picture with Ingrid’s facial expression after just a small sip of it, I believe you would understand. Still, I find idea of getting drunk from a dairy product quite comical.
Naadam Festival
We rearranged our whole Asian trip to be in Ulaanbaatar during their traditional 2-day “Olympic Games” called Naadam Festival – the time when all Mongolians grow extra height with pride. I suppose for them, it might be a reminder of Chinggis-Khaan era when half a million skilled militant Mongolians managed to invade & rule over 60 million Chinese preoccupied with agriculture. The main disciplines of Naadam are wresting, archery and horse racing though wrestling gets the most attention. Depending on how many rounds they win, the wrestles are bestowed glorious titles ranging from falcon, elephant or lion to the most prestigious “Eye-Pleasing Nationally Famous Mighty and Invincible Giant”.
White Telephone Guys and Bottle Collectors
Collapse of Soviet Union’s economy had a domino effect on tightly connected Mongolian economy, thus the cost of labor is really low. Instead of telephone boots you can find telephone ladies or guys who do nothing but hold telephone sets in hand the whole day and wait for people to come and call. To find them you just need to look for white hat or cap.
Although definitely not a capital winning the prize for cleanliness, Ulaanbaatar has one environmental feature which works really well – plastic bottle collectors. We already noticed them in China & Tibet, but in Mongolia during Naadam they were especially determined. I do not know how much they are getting for a bottle, but it must be a meaningful amount for them – when they see you with a half-empty bottle in hand, they come to stand by you while hypnotizing both you & the bottle until you finish.
Best Toilet View
I had the best toilet view ever one particular evening at the edge of Gobi Desert with 180 degrees of pure emptiness and silence disturbed momentarily only by an unfortunate little lizard rushing in a direction away from the toilet.
Shopping Mania #3
This is getting really serious: After landing in Hong Kong, I have bought an SLR camera with two huge lenses. When we carry our full-load luggage now, Ingrid’s backpack is bigger than herself and I look like a Nepalese sherpa with my load of almost 60kg (130lb). Trust me, I could feel every gram of it after the elevator broke down and I had to do 17 floors with it, rushing to the airport. People on the streets turn around, even sometimes wave at us. Now, Ingrid discovered her frequent-flyer card entitles us to additional 20kg. So if you do not see me in September, I probably collapsed on the way to Bangkok airport.
HIGH-TECH POLITENESS ALA JAPANESE STYLE
Executive Summary
There is hardly any other country like Japan in the world. This was the key reason why we decided to come despite the horrendous prices. Thanks to our great hosts - my two classmates Nori with his wife Aya and Yusuke, our 8-day trip Tokyo-Hakone-Shizuoka-Kyoto-Fuji had a different dimension. In my eyes, this country of hierarchies has two fascinating faces blending together: traditional and ultra-modern one.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/Japan#
Spot-on Clues
Surprising upgrade to business class on our flight from Hong Kong to Tokyo was truly symbolic. Japan is really a business-class country. They say that if you want to see how the future looks like, come to Japan. I believe it is true – Tokyo appeared to me more high-tech and shinier even than New York. Unlike the rest of Asia, everything is extremely efficient, minimizes costly people hours and works great. Shinkansen - bullet train reaching 300 km/h (190mph) and operating 30 years without a fatality is only one example. It proved to be even faster than my camera autofocus so after 15th attempt I just gave up. Pricewise, it is also business class. I now understand why Japan is in deflation, it simply cannot get any higher. One week in Japan buys you one year in Myanmar.
I did not have clue that having my credit card swallowed by an ATM at Tokyo airport is going to be symbolic too. If you are hosted by your Japanese friends, you will have a great difficulty to use your credit card. After half an hour of wresting over who pays and threatening that they will get offended, you simply capitulate. They call it ”Japanese style”…
Unmatched Politeness
Japanese people amaze you with their politeness which is difficult to match. You enter a store to ask for a direction without buying anything, they will thank you. When they thank you, they bow. If you try to be polite and bow back, they will bow again and twice as much. Importantly, unlike some other nations you feel this politeness is 100% genuine.
Japanese Cuisine
Already in Boston I noticed Japanese food is not bad at all, but in Japan I realized how fantastic it is. On the first night, Aya’s mother hosted us with tempora, the best meal of our trip so far. It reminds Chinese hot pot a bit, but instead of hot water, you dip all sorts of yummy stuff in hot oil. Only in Japan you eat beans or sticky rice in a desert without thinking that the cook got drunk. They are not only delicious but also look great. Green tea in Japanese style looks like a spinach sauce. It is so thick and strong I was afraid that I will not be able to close my eyes for at least two days straight. I guess they came up with a complicated tea ceremony full of twist and turns so that you do not drink too much of it in a day.
Toilet Cockpit
Operating Japanese toilet requires manual because at the more sophisticated ones you feel like in a cockpit. There are so many buttons you are grateful that at least flushing is intuitive. You can set everything from intensity of seat heating, water cleaning, fan to birds singing sounds.
Climbing Fuji
Climbing Fuji is definitely not heroic. Thousands of hikers including retired Japanese climb this 3776m (12,285ft) volcano every year. I have never seen such an infrastructure on a mountain. You feel a bit like on a subway. Most of the hikers start at the fifths station and walk up to 10th station on the summit. After the 8th station you can spot signs reading “Do not give up”. On top of the mountain, you face a dilemma which vending machine to buy Coke from. But beware, this mountain can be dangerous, even hazardous! When we took our summit photo, we almost got rolled over by a yellow bulldozer which was smoothing the way down. Still, a combination of overnight bus from Kyoto, extremely windy weather, and almost half the normal ascent time limit in order to catch another bus to Tokyo made it quite a challenge for us.
HONG KONG SKYLINES
Executive Summary
Gorgeous green mountains surrounding this ultra-modern trading hub give it different touch. Paradoxically, it both feels and does not feel Chinese. In any case, it is beautiful.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/HongKong#
Boxing Match in Matchbox
A true capsule hotel waited for us only in central Hong Kong in a ghetto of budget guesthouses called Chunking Mansions. The room was only marginally bigger than a matchbox, but we did not feel like looking around at midnight and the price was hard to beat. It turned out to be a real bargain because our stay included international female boxing match between Asian owner and African tenant who was not too eager to pay her rent. Fortunately, the owner quickly figured her chances are slim considering African lady’s double size. Thus, the match prematurely ended in 2nd round when she opted to lock herself in a room of a watch trader from Sri Lanka who suspiciously reminded my classmate Abhi. She could barely get in because half of Abhi’s matchbox room was filled with 10,000 radio-controlled watches for sale in Sri Lanka.
Expensive Geography Lesson
After the match, Abhi knocked on our door to ask if we were from Netherlands by any chance. He said could not set watches because they came with Dutch manual. Although not speaking one word of Dutch, previously owning radio-controlled watch and positively believing in my capabilities, I have spent another 2 hours furiously figuring the watch with minimum results. The next day, Ingrid learned from the manual that watch-dealer Abhi had a bigger problem then he originally thought. The radio tower conveniently located in Frankfurt, Germany had only 1500km reach, so there was little hope that any of Abhi’s watches in Sri Lanka will ever fulfill its mission unless their owners will really enjoy vacationing in Europe.
BROTHERHOOD IN INDIAN MOTHERLAND
Executive Summary
The “Incredible India” slogan on Delhi’s airport billboard is definitely not an overpromise. Whether it is breathtaking Taj Mahal, romantic Udaipur, hectic Bollywood, spiritual Pushkar or adventurous Jodhpur, India overwhelms you. It is so intense that in many respects, comparing India motherland to the rest of developing Asia is like comparing concentrate to dilute. What you experience here, you can hardly see anywhere else. They say you either love or hate India. We loved it.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/ASIABooklet#
Bollywood
When we laughed at a crazy Indian musical movie on the airplane to Bombay, we did not have a clue that for a day, we are going to be part of the most important industry in this city. Just before spending unforgettable evening with my Indian classmate Abishek & his driver in Bombay’s best spots, we had been approached by a recruiting scout from Bollywood. Off course, we hesitated whether to accept his offer or not. For about 0.312 seconds. For those interested in our short but nonetheless talented performance in a disco-bar background, the title of the movie is Pyare Mohan directed by Idra Kumar. Being a rookie, I was taken under the wings of James from California who married Indian lady and has been working as an extra in Bollywood for almost two years. He showed me around and took quality time to explain in detail how demanding and tough this job is. I still have some doubts because after 8 hours of reading newspapers interrupted only by two brief shooting sessions and a lunch break, we took our 1200 rupees (more than an average monthly salary in India) and went home.
Brotherhood
I very much enjoyed being called brother in India - you truly feel like part of a family. On top, Indians are enormously friendly and funny people - both to laugh at and to laugh with. One young hotel owner revealed deepest secrets of his love life to Ingrid including his abundant international correspondence. Even my presence did not stop him from reciting Ingrid his love poems on a roof-top restaurant overlooking gorgeous lake and stunning Udaipur palace during the most romantic nigh of our trip.
Although I felt surprisingly safe, I have to confess I had to use my body size to claim our rights a few times. I almost assassinated two taxi drivers and chased one guy in heavy traffic jumping through rickshaws very much like in James Bond movie Octopussy (produced in Jodhpur) which we saw two days prior to the incident. Other times, however, my size did not come too handy. Ironically, in the most expensive hotel we stayed outside Japan, I could not walk straight because the ceiling was about 10cm shorter than me. I suffered so many hits in the head during that stay that I am seriously concerned about how I am going to graduate.
Indian Cuisine
Indian food has always been my No1 choice, but I was surprised that I loved it even without any meat. Many restaurants do not serve meat and in spiritual towns like Pushkar, meat is outright forbidden. However, after 14 days of meat fasting I absolutely enjoyed spicy Mc Maharaja in McDonald’s which is by far the best burger I have ever had. Interestingly, India is the only country where we did not see Big Mac on the menu. Even if it survived Mc Maharaja’s competition – which I doubt, there probably would not be too high demand for the beef burger in the country of sacred cow.
I do not need to tell you after all those shopping-mania stories that we bought about 3kg of spices in Jodhpur. As a reward, the store owner introduced to us spice called Winter Tonic. We quickly got what it is intended for after his “jiggy-jiggy all the night non-stop” guarantee backed by very eloquent sign language. His hand-made brochure in a get-slim-fast style filled with “before & after-effect” photos of tourists was also quite entertaining. I became a bit more skeptical once the key “secret” ingredient, which nobody else in town has, turned out to be Chinese ginseng.
Transport without Limits
Indians could give lessons in efficiency even to Japanese. They push capacity limits beyond human understanding. Indian transportation deserves to be called world wonder just as much as Taj Mahal.
I remember being impressed by Indonesian motorbike drivers last year seeing 3 or even 4 people on one bike. In India, it very rarely goes below 3 and maximum we have seen was 6. Makes you thing whether we do not underestimate these vehicles back home. ;-) Similarly, if it existed in Europe, rickshaw would probably take max 3 passengers. In US, I believe safety measures would narrow it down to two. In Agra, the average number was about 10 with quite a few dazzling cases of more than 15 locals in one rickshaw.
Commuting on a rush-hour city train in Bombay is a bit like a triathlon. It starts with a boxing fight among excited passengers before the train actually stops. Then, it requires unhuman pushing to qualify into the train already so full that if people inside started breathing properly, those hanging from outside would fall off. Finally, when getting off, running is the only option if you do not wish to be rolled over because exiting mass very much reminds a shot from a warm Champaign bottle.
We also tried a bit unconventional transport in Jodhpur – camel safari. All our FWD vehicles – Mr. Rokez, Mr. Sing and Mr. Raja were remarkably energetic but did not seem to enjoy our presence too much. This combination turned our safari into rodeo. When Mr. Sing suddenly decided to take off like a rocket, our overwhelmed French friend could not come out with anything better than “Ole, Oleeee” as his body bounced back and forth in a spectacular free-style performance. After having my adventurous go for half an hour on Mr. Rokez I decided to stay in the cart for the remaining two days and observe hard landings of our fellow travelers instead.
Big Troubles of Small India
Although incredible, India has many huge problems which in my eyes do not get adequate attention. The key problem is overpopulation. If they continue to grow at this pace (+20% in the last decade), soon every second brother in world will be Indian. The resulting issue worsened by Indian no-problem attitude is pollution. I have never seen so much garbage in my entire life. Ganga River is so polluted it is septic. Excrements from cows living in the streets add another smelly and sliding challenge. Some parts of larger cities look like a garbage site. All in all, things need to start happening so that India is not breathtaking in two ways.
ULTIMATE SOUTHEAST-ASIAN TRIO
Executive Summary
Good–natured natives of Cambodia and Myanmar exploited by their corrupted dictators might be gradually witnessing a better future. What a shame they were isolated and devastated for so many decades. Extravagant beauty of Angkor’s hundreds of temples in Cambodia will stay with us forever. So will the breathtaking view on Bagan’s three thousand pagodas in Myanmar, Inle Lake’s amazing floating villages but most of all their unbelievably kind and modest people.
Thailand was the right cherry on the cake of our Asian trip. No wonder everybody loves this country. Delicious food, magnificent seaside, terrific massages, and constantly smiling people - you name it, this country has everything to succeed as a tourist paradise.
Cambodia – Angkormania
Heavenly Angkor
The 12-hour head-banging concert with our heads bouncing around like popcorn on the backseat of a local bus paid off thousand times. I was sitting like Alice in Wonderland in this world’s largest religious building and could not get enough of its magnificence. Dazzling 216 stone faces of the Bayon temple, parasite tree roots creeping through the stone walls of Ta Prohm, or balloon-view of Angkor Wat - you simply need to see to understand.
Geography Quiz
I thought souvenir sellers could not really surprise me anymore, but the kids in Angkor did. Besides echoed singing of their slogans in duets or pitbull-like persistence, one six-year old had a striking offer. “Sir, if you tell me capital of Madagascar, I don’t sell you any longer.” I countered that I will buy his flute if he tells me capital of Slovakia. This triggered action of a magnitude which we did not anticipate. All the kids instantly scattered through Angkor in search for the answer. A few came back after few minutes with a victorious look in their eyes shouting “Ljubljana” only to hear from me disappointing “Slovakia not Slovenia”. Eventually, my boy sold his flute because he dragged over an English tourist who lived with a Slovak for a year in London. All the kids then mumbled repeatedly “Bratislava, Bratislava…”. Since then, I used this question each time kids rolled on us. I bet our prime minister would be proud of me.
Myanmar – Forgotten in 16th Century
Rainy Season Logistics
If you will ever plan your Myanmar trip, please understand that when they say rainy season in central Myanmar, they really mean it. Pilgrimage to the stunning Golden Rock temple was supposed to be one of the highlights of our trip. But I swear it was pouring for all five days non-stop. So instead of the beautiful shots of Golden Rock we were stuck in water polo.
Traffic Nuances
For quite a while I could not come up with a good reason why cars in Myanmar have the wheel on the right side and drive on the same side of the road other than to ensure quite an excitement at every curve. Then we read that originally, the cars in Myanmar were driving on the left side. However, a couple years ago, the state head went to an astrologist who told him to lead the country more towards the right. So he started with the traffic.
Overall, journey times quoted are very elastic due to all the variables, and it is considered bad luck to ask how much longer. Sometimes, I was getting drenched with 30 locals on top of a truck, other times I was calming down a chicken of a schoolboy during his routine bus commute home. Ingrid was not allowed to join me on the roof because” it would insult the men below her”.
Thailand - Siamese Smile
International Partnership
Paradoxically, Thai girls are too shy to wear bathing suits covering their whole body in sarong instead, yet Thailand has world-famous sex tourism. When you come to Bangkok, one thing which hits you right away is an astonishing number of international couples in the streets. Usually, it is an ugly white male walking hand-in-hand with a local girl in her twenties who could easily be a Miss Thailand finalist and often also his granddaughter.
Hua Hin
After demanding Indian trip, we badly needed that week in gorgeous five-star Hyatt Regency in Hua Hin seaside resort. I believe I have found my place for retirement. Just to give you feel for some costs: dinner in a nice restaurant $3-10, two-hour oil massage $12, tailor-made suit $80-120 and they say Hua Hin is overpriced. Best of all, our one week stay in Hyatt – free, thanks to one of Ingrid’s magic diamond cards. I just love them. And of course her as well. ;-)
It feels Hua Hin has only 5 businesses: hotel & restaurants, internet cafes, massage saloons, taxis and last but not least tailors. I promise you cannot stand anywhere in the town without being able to point to a tailor store. If your tailor place is called just Boss or Armani, you are not quite cutting it through the clutter. You need to be at least Grand Boss or Royal Armani – anyhow that’s name of the place where I got my tuxedo & 5 shirts (I guess it did not catch you unprepared by now) to wrap up our 110kg (220lb) luggage.
Smilies
If it would be enough to have cheap food, sex and nice seaside in order to win hearts of tourists, every other country in Asia could make it. What I believe is special about Thailand is hospitality, attitude and quality of its people. First of all, people smile non-stop. There are many Thai words which you cannot even say without smiling. Secondly, being predominantly Buddhist, Thais are very peaceful and tolerant. Finally, Thais come across as very capable individuals who have built infrastructure, businesses and hospitals none of the countries in the region except Malaysia can compare to. I believe this country has an enormous potential.
Executive Summary
As you might know, this summer 2005, in 101 days, Ingrid and I are traveling through China, Tibet, Mongolia, Hong Kong, Japan, Thailand, Myanmar, Cambodia and India so I would like to send a couple of updates to let you know the highlights.
China, a fascinating blend of Communism, Confucianism and Capitalism with fantastic cuisine and stunning temples, is a country you have to visit. Though language is certainly a challenge, hardly anywhere else you will witness uniform office exercises on the street, enjoy taste of a snake, see breath-taking Shaolin kung-fu or count thousands of Terracotta warriors.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/China#
Size Disparities
China is huge. Every larger city has more citizens than there are Slovaks in the world. Although people are not particularly sizable, especially in comparison with me, Beijing reminds Moscow with its mania for huge size of everything from roads, buildings to squares. Some taxis are certainly an exception. I felt like the one which we used yesterday qualifies to Guinness Book. This 1.2x0.8m metal "can" is capable of staffing driver and 2 passengers (+ kid if necessary). It is not only the cheapest but also the fastest means of travel passing through the traffic together with motorcycles.Language Challenges
Combination of Chinese writing and pathetic English language skills create pretty challenging environment even for seasoned travelers. Anybody who can say "hello" or "bye" qualifies as fluent English speaker here.
Food Specialties
It is worth to visit China just for its fantastic cuisine. It feels like in Europe, we play only one or two violins while Chinese food provides a true orchestra concert of tastes. I have also tried everything from snakes to scorpions on a special food market in Beijing. My favorite was grilled grasshopper. I do not think Chinese eat all this, just crazy tourists like me so that they can then boast on their blogs.Unbeatable Service
In spite of communist impact, China proves once again that Asians are simply unbeatable in service.Although most public toilets here are a breath-holding test, the experience at Beijing Airport was very different. Just before I walked into a cabin, the service guy cleaned the toilet so meticulously that I could see my reflection and skillfully handcrafted a square cover from a toilet paper on top of it. Though there was already one roll in the cabin, in a moment, he was pushing another one through under the door "Sir, Sir, more paper, more paper". When he heard me unlocking, he rushed to open my door, hand me a paper towel, run water and show me were soap is. All this 5-star service was accompanied by professional smile and gentle bow. It was not only the best ever toilet service I have received, I also believe this Mr. Charmin deserves to be named Entrepreneur of the Year for figuring out how to make money on the job where others never would.
On top, white Caucasians – especially tall or blond get what I would call "national hero" treatment in China. Greetings on the street and requests for group pictures (especially with Ingrid) became routine but some things can still catch me unprepared. In Louyang, each time I entered grocery I got personal female assistant who walked around the store with me, translated all products descriptions, smiled constantly and wondered how tall I am.
Fitness Discipline
I could not stop laughing when at 8am, the whole office of China Bank run out of the building in their uniforms, lined-up and started exercising to the upbeat music. It reminded me our elementary-school fitness exercises during communist era.
As said food is delicious so I try to keep fit here too. Chinese have these simple fitness centers in public parks where I was doing pull-ups one morning and felt pretty good as it seemed I got some interest of several teenage girls. After I finished, a 7-year old boy challenged me to compete with him. I smiled and accepted. Then he swiftly did his 15 repetitions and left in tears both me & my Fan Club.Talking sports, though a bit disgusting, I have to mention this one. Chinese are world champions in spitting. I was warned about this before we arrived and have to say Beijing did not meet my "high" expectations. However, as we moved west, the expectations were far exceeded. It is not only the spitting but all those sound effects that precede it. Ladies here can be especially impressive. Nobody seems to bother with placing it, whether it is a walkway in a bus or a spot under your table in a restaurant. I already got used to it but you can imagine Ingrid particularly enjoys witnessing this peculiar national sport.
Countless Attractions
Nixon pretty much said it with "It surely is a great wall" when he saw it. Also, I did not count all Terracotta warriors in Xian but there were quite a few of them. Temples in Beijing, Xian and other cities were truly great, but I have to say that, similar to Egypt, we are starting to get Sightseeing Overload Syndrome, so we are cutting down on temples and the like.
When we arrived to Shaolin on Sunday, it looked rather like a shabby laundry camp for kids. However, the next day 5am I realized where we are when roaring of 7000 athletes woke us up. It is unbelievable what those kids can do with their body. We have also seen a show from which a highlight for me was popping balloons with a nail through a glass block. The Speedy Gonzales simply shot a hole through the glass, much like a bullet does, with only a nail in his hand. If you really want, you can also learn all this for 600 USD/months (housing + training fee for foreigners). I myself would not mind.
After a visit in Panda Research Base in Chengdu, I am pretty positive I was panda in my previous life. Its not that (as you surely guessed) they are so adorable, but because I have never seen a more lazy creature in my life.Shopping Mania
Once again, we proved our obsession with shopping. Among the highlights, I got 5 suits made & bought 3 sets of Chinese porcelain in the first week. The problem this time is that we have to carry it all around Asia for another three months.
7 DAYS IN TIBET
Executive Summary
Tibet, with its average altitude of 4000m/13000ft, is a place where sky is virtually touching the ground. The 7-day jeep trip from Lhasa to Everest Base Camp (5200m/17000ft) was definitely one of the best trips of my life. Listening to chanting in amazing monasteries, staring at magnificent Himalayan panoramas, meeting nomads around stunning Nam-tso lake and getting to a stone-throw distance from Everest were only a few highlights. For the complete Himalayan experience, however, I recommend to take a trip from Nepal to Tibet. While Tibet beats Nepal with its monasteries, music, architecture and panorama-mountain views, in Nepal, you will share your Himalayan experience with only those who were equally willing to undergo the torture of multiple-day strenuous hiking.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/Tibet#
Tibet vs. Nepal
Where the hell is Everest?
On our trip to Everest Base Camp, whenever we saw a mountain panorama, our driver (who could say only ”Hello” & “Let’s go” in English) would point to the biggest mountain and say “Chomolungma”. When we asked: “and Everest?”, we got no response. As I was an “old dog” in the team, everybody turned to me to clarify this mystery. I confidently explained that the mountain which appears the biggest is Choyu - one of the Himalaya eight-thousand meter mountains - and Chomolungma is most likely its long name. But Everest must be somewhere close as Choyu is only 30km away from it. To make it bullet-proof, I nailed it with my Nepalese learning that Everest is not the highest-appearing mountain because it is most likely further from us. Everybody nodded with acknowledgment. I myself felt Hillary would probably not explain it better. I only realized that Chomolungma is a Tibetan name for Everest after we were so close to it that there was no other mountain around.Tibetan Talent Pool
Read Your Guidebook Properly
On the way back from Tibet, I noticed that Chinese city Xian had the highest number of hairdressers per capita so I decided it is time to get my haircut (especially because many of them were quite pretty and warmly inviting me inside). For some reason, they were surprised when I showed that I wish to get a haircut and even more when Ingrid (who was walking a block behind me taking pictures) walked in. It took them more than 15 minutes to get a proper hairdresser. Paradoxically, although I look bald now thanks to her “mastery”, this must be the sexiest haircut I ever got: We learned from Lonely Planet later that small hair-dressing saloons are a cover for ladies offering very different kind of a service.Bus vs. Train
Friendly advice: if you can choose, go for train. I am writing this message from Chinese “Orient Express” connecting Shanghai & Beijing, the best train I have ever taken beating even majority of my flight experiences.
National Sports #2
Tibetans don’t believe in personal space. Whenever we stopped anywhere close to civilization, people would stare through the car windows or get so close to you when watching the display of your digital camera that you could feel their breath on your neck and without a shadow of a doubt identify their last meal.Tibetan national sport #2 is definitely pool. Although Namche Bazar (Nepalese gate village to Everest at 3500m) officially boasts with highest-located pool table in the world, we have seen at least 100 pool tables in Tibet at higher elevation. You can play as high as Nam-tso Lake at 4700m. If you are as enthusiastic as Tibetan players, you will not even mind the sticks which are as bumpy as Tibetan roads.
I still have to mention that Chinese national sport #2 (just behind spitting which we learned is ironically illegal) is getting sitting spots in a subway. The best athletes (often as old as 50) will roll over you before you manage to get off, approaching seats with a speed of light. Those who manage to take the seat can be identified by a victorious grin on their face lasting for the rest of the journey.
Shopping Mania #2
Since the last time, when I wondered how we are going to carry all our acquisitions, we doubled our porcelain sets to solid 6 which is now equaling the number of suits (with double # of the trousers). To bring it home safely, we also bought two sizable ”Gucci” bags and about 30 pieces of underwear for padding. I guess Slovak national sport must be shopping…
MONGOLIA FROM SADDLE
Executive Summary
Mongolia, a nomadic country without fences, is truly unique. On top, it is so gorgeous it would be a waste of time trying to describe it in words. Even our pictures cannot fully capture its magnificence. You simply have to come and explore. During our 9-day jeep/horse/camel trip from Ulaanbaatar to Gobi Desert, we covered everything from sipping Airag in traditional ger tents, walking in ice valleys, riding horses and camels in canyons and arid plateaus to climbing sand dunes. Although the beginnings were tough, we can ride horses like cowboys now. ;)
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/Mongolia#
Right on the first night, we visited an impressive Mongolian cultural performance in Ulaanbaatar. Besides snake-like acrobats who proved to have no bones, the highlight of the show was khoomi or “deep throat”. To my surprise, in Mongolia, deep throat is a special style of singing from larynx, throat and stomach which produces two tones at the same time. Although I have to admit it is very intriguing, female singers can be so loud you wish you brought earplugs.Mongolian Saddle
One of my key objectives for Mongolia was to learn how to ride a horse. Thus, we started already on the second day – to adjust a bit. Other than I was bigger than the horse (Mongolian horses are smaller than European ones), everything seemed to be OK. But riding a horse only once before coming to Mongolia, I was not really an expert. After half an hour of riding, I started to feel traditional Mongolian wooden saddle padded with just a thin piece of leather is not exactly the best company for my bottom. However, we were here to adjust, so I kept adjusting. One hour later, I could barely stay the pain. Unfortunately, we paid for 4 hours so I dragged on for another half an hour to use up my free minutes. Forgive me my inexperience in the last update, when I connected definition of “ass-ache” to Tibetan roads. That was barely a silky fingertip massage compared to Mongolian saddle. Half-standing during the jeep ride home, I knew I had a problem.
At home, after inspection of the results in a mirror, I decided for a radical step. We opened our first-aid kit and Ingrid applied iodine tincture on the afflicted area. It probably helped but our neighbors five floors above could testify that my simultaneous vocal performance definitely beaten even the loudest deep-throat singers from the night before.
Airag
Forget all you know about Mongolian barbecue restaurants, you simply do not come to Mongolia for food. One item which is worth mentioning though is wide-spread Mongolian national drink Airag - fermented mare (horse) milk with alcohol content of 3-4%. It tastes a bit like Slovak “zincica” but is much stronger. - I guess, especially non-Slovaks must have a perfect picture now. ;-) If I attached picture with Ingrid’s facial expression after just a small sip of it, I believe you would understand. Still, I find idea of getting drunk from a dairy product quite comical.Naadam Festival
We rearranged our whole Asian trip to be in Ulaanbaatar during their traditional 2-day “Olympic Games” called Naadam Festival – the time when all Mongolians grow extra height with pride. I suppose for them, it might be a reminder of Chinggis-Khaan era when half a million skilled militant Mongolians managed to invade & rule over 60 million Chinese preoccupied with agriculture. The main disciplines of Naadam are wresting, archery and horse racing though wrestling gets the most attention. Depending on how many rounds they win, the wrestles are bestowed glorious titles ranging from falcon, elephant or lion to the most prestigious “Eye-Pleasing Nationally Famous Mighty and Invincible Giant”.White Telephone Guys and Bottle Collectors
Although definitely not a capital winning the prize for cleanliness, Ulaanbaatar has one environmental feature which works really well – plastic bottle collectors. We already noticed them in China & Tibet, but in Mongolia during Naadam they were especially determined. I do not know how much they are getting for a bottle, but it must be a meaningful amount for them – when they see you with a half-empty bottle in hand, they come to stand by you while hypnotizing both you & the bottle until you finish.
Best Toilet View
I had the best toilet view ever one particular evening at the edge of Gobi Desert with 180 degrees of pure emptiness and silence disturbed momentarily only by an unfortunate little lizard rushing in a direction away from the toilet.
Shopping Mania #3
This is getting really serious: After landing in Hong Kong, I have bought an SLR camera with two huge lenses. When we carry our full-load luggage now, Ingrid’s backpack is bigger than herself and I look like a Nepalese sherpa with my load of almost 60kg (130lb). Trust me, I could feel every gram of it after the elevator broke down and I had to do 17 floors with it, rushing to the airport. People on the streets turn around, even sometimes wave at us. Now, Ingrid discovered her frequent-flyer card entitles us to additional 20kg. So if you do not see me in September, I probably collapsed on the way to Bangkok airport.
HIGH-TECH POLITENESS ALA JAPANESE STYLE
Executive Summary
There is hardly any other country like Japan in the world. This was the key reason why we decided to come despite the horrendous prices. Thanks to our great hosts - my two classmates Nori with his wife Aya and Yusuke, our 8-day trip Tokyo-Hakone-Shizuoka-Kyoto-Fuji had a different dimension. In my eyes, this country of hierarchies has two fascinating faces blending together: traditional and ultra-modern one.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/Japan#
Spot-on Clues
Surprising upgrade to business class on our flight from Hong Kong to Tokyo was truly symbolic. Japan is really a business-class country. They say that if you want to see how the future looks like, come to Japan. I believe it is true – Tokyo appeared to me more high-tech and shinier even than New York. Unlike the rest of Asia, everything is extremely efficient, minimizes costly people hours and works great. Shinkansen - bullet train reaching 300 km/h (190mph) and operating 30 years without a fatality is only one example. It proved to be even faster than my camera autofocus so after 15th attempt I just gave up. Pricewise, it is also business class. I now understand why Japan is in deflation, it simply cannot get any higher. One week in Japan buys you one year in Myanmar.I did not have clue that having my credit card swallowed by an ATM at Tokyo airport is going to be symbolic too. If you are hosted by your Japanese friends, you will have a great difficulty to use your credit card. After half an hour of wresting over who pays and threatening that they will get offended, you simply capitulate. They call it ”Japanese style”…
Unmatched Politeness
Japanese people amaze you with their politeness which is difficult to match. You enter a store to ask for a direction without buying anything, they will thank you. When they thank you, they bow. If you try to be polite and bow back, they will bow again and twice as much. Importantly, unlike some other nations you feel this politeness is 100% genuine.Japanese Cuisine
Already in Boston I noticed Japanese food is not bad at all, but in Japan I realized how fantastic it is. On the first night, Aya’s mother hosted us with tempora, the best meal of our trip so far. It reminds Chinese hot pot a bit, but instead of hot water, you dip all sorts of yummy stuff in hot oil. Only in Japan you eat beans or sticky rice in a desert without thinking that the cook got drunk. They are not only delicious but also look great. Green tea in Japanese style looks like a spinach sauce. It is so thick and strong I was afraid that I will not be able to close my eyes for at least two days straight. I guess they came up with a complicated tea ceremony full of twist and turns so that you do not drink too much of it in a day.
Toilet Cockpit
Operating Japanese toilet requires manual because at the more sophisticated ones you feel like in a cockpit. There are so many buttons you are grateful that at least flushing is intuitive. You can set everything from intensity of seat heating, water cleaning, fan to birds singing sounds.Climbing Fuji
Climbing Fuji is definitely not heroic. Thousands of hikers including retired Japanese climb this 3776m (12,285ft) volcano every year. I have never seen such an infrastructure on a mountain. You feel a bit like on a subway. Most of the hikers start at the fifths station and walk up to 10th station on the summit. After the 8th station you can spot signs reading “Do not give up”. On top of the mountain, you face a dilemma which vending machine to buy Coke from. But beware, this mountain can be dangerous, even hazardous! When we took our summit photo, we almost got rolled over by a yellow bulldozer which was smoothing the way down. Still, a combination of overnight bus from Kyoto, extremely windy weather, and almost half the normal ascent time limit in order to catch another bus to Tokyo made it quite a challenge for us.HONG KONG SKYLINES
Executive Summary
Gorgeous green mountains surrounding this ultra-modern trading hub give it different touch. Paradoxically, it both feels and does not feel Chinese. In any case, it is beautiful.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/HongKong#
Boxing Match in Matchbox
Expensive Geography Lesson
BROTHERHOOD IN INDIAN MOTHERLAND
Executive Summary
The “Incredible India” slogan on Delhi’s airport billboard is definitely not an overpromise. Whether it is breathtaking Taj Mahal, romantic Udaipur, hectic Bollywood, spiritual Pushkar or adventurous Jodhpur, India overwhelms you. It is so intense that in many respects, comparing India motherland to the rest of developing Asia is like comparing concentrate to dilute. What you experience here, you can hardly see anywhere else. They say you either love or hate India. We loved it.
https://picasaweb.google.com/rastislav.kulich/ASIABooklet#
Bollywood
Brotherhood
Although I felt surprisingly safe, I have to confess I had to use my body size to claim our rights a few times. I almost assassinated two taxi drivers and chased one guy in heavy traffic jumping through rickshaws very much like in James Bond movie Octopussy (produced in Jodhpur) which we saw two days prior to the incident. Other times, however, my size did not come too handy. Ironically, in the most expensive hotel we stayed outside Japan, I could not walk straight because the ceiling was about 10cm shorter than me. I suffered so many hits in the head during that stay that I am seriously concerned about how I am going to graduate.
Indian Cuisine
I do not need to tell you after all those shopping-mania stories that we bought about 3kg of spices in Jodhpur. As a reward, the store owner introduced to us spice called Winter Tonic. We quickly got what it is intended for after his “jiggy-jiggy all the night non-stop” guarantee backed by very eloquent sign language. His hand-made brochure in a get-slim-fast style filled with “before & after-effect” photos of tourists was also quite entertaining. I became a bit more skeptical once the key “secret” ingredient, which nobody else in town has, turned out to be Chinese ginseng.
Transport without Limits
I remember being impressed by Indonesian motorbike drivers last year seeing 3 or even 4 people on one bike. In India, it very rarely goes below 3 and maximum we have seen was 6. Makes you thing whether we do not underestimate these vehicles back home. ;-) Similarly, if it existed in Europe, rickshaw would probably take max 3 passengers. In US, I believe safety measures would narrow it down to two. In Agra, the average number was about 10 with quite a few dazzling cases of more than 15 locals in one rickshaw.
Commuting on a rush-hour city train in Bombay is a bit like a triathlon. It starts with a boxing fight among excited passengers before the train actually stops. Then, it requires unhuman pushing to qualify into the train already so full that if people inside started breathing properly, those hanging from outside would fall off. Finally, when getting off, running is the only option if you do not wish to be rolled over because exiting mass very much reminds a shot from a warm Champaign bottle.
We also tried a bit unconventional transport in Jodhpur – camel safari. All our FWD vehicles – Mr. Rokez, Mr. Sing and Mr. Raja were remarkably energetic but did not seem to enjoy our presence too much. This combination turned our safari into rodeo. When Mr. Sing suddenly decided to take off like a rocket, our overwhelmed French friend could not come out with anything better than “Ole, Oleeee” as his body bounced back and forth in a spectacular free-style performance. After having my adventurous go for half an hour on Mr. Rokez I decided to stay in the cart for the remaining two days and observe hard landings of our fellow travelers instead.Big Troubles of Small India
Although incredible, India has many huge problems which in my eyes do not get adequate attention. The key problem is overpopulation. If they continue to grow at this pace (+20% in the last decade), soon every second brother in world will be Indian. The resulting issue worsened by Indian no-problem attitude is pollution. I have never seen so much garbage in my entire life. Ganga River is so polluted it is septic. Excrements from cows living in the streets add another smelly and sliding challenge. Some parts of larger cities look like a garbage site. All in all, things need to start happening so that India is not breathtaking in two ways.
ULTIMATE SOUTHEAST-ASIAN TRIO
Executive Summary
Good–natured natives of Cambodia and Myanmar exploited by their corrupted dictators might be gradually witnessing a better future. What a shame they were isolated and devastated for so many decades. Extravagant beauty of Angkor’s hundreds of temples in Cambodia will stay with us forever. So will the breathtaking view on Bagan’s three thousand pagodas in Myanmar, Inle Lake’s amazing floating villages but most of all their unbelievably kind and modest people.
Thailand was the right cherry on the cake of our Asian trip. No wonder everybody loves this country. Delicious food, magnificent seaside, terrific massages, and constantly smiling people - you name it, this country has everything to succeed as a tourist paradise.
Cambodia – Angkormania
Heavenly Angkor
Geography Quiz
I thought souvenir sellers could not really surprise me anymore, but the kids in Angkor did. Besides echoed singing of their slogans in duets or pitbull-like persistence, one six-year old had a striking offer. “Sir, if you tell me capital of Madagascar, I don’t sell you any longer.” I countered that I will buy his flute if he tells me capital of Slovakia. This triggered action of a magnitude which we did not anticipate. All the kids instantly scattered through Angkor in search for the answer. A few came back after few minutes with a victorious look in their eyes shouting “Ljubljana” only to hear from me disappointing “Slovakia not Slovenia”. Eventually, my boy sold his flute because he dragged over an English tourist who lived with a Slovak for a year in London. All the kids then mumbled repeatedly “Bratislava, Bratislava…”. Since then, I used this question each time kids rolled on us. I bet our prime minister would be proud of me.
Myanmar – Forgotten in 16th Century
Rainy Season Logistics
Traffic Nuances
For quite a while I could not come up with a good reason why cars in Myanmar have the wheel on the right side and drive on the same side of the road other than to ensure quite an excitement at every curve. Then we read that originally, the cars in Myanmar were driving on the left side. However, a couple years ago, the state head went to an astrologist who told him to lead the country more towards the right. So he started with the traffic.
Thailand - Siamese Smile
International Partnership
Paradoxically, Thai girls are too shy to wear bathing suits covering their whole body in sarong instead, yet Thailand has world-famous sex tourism. When you come to Bangkok, one thing which hits you right away is an astonishing number of international couples in the streets. Usually, it is an ugly white male walking hand-in-hand with a local girl in her twenties who could easily be a Miss Thailand finalist and often also his granddaughter.
Hua Hin
It feels Hua Hin has only 5 businesses: hotel & restaurants, internet cafes, massage saloons, taxis and last but not least tailors. I promise you cannot stand anywhere in the town without being able to point to a tailor store. If your tailor place is called just Boss or Armani, you are not quite cutting it through the clutter. You need to be at least Grand Boss or Royal Armani – anyhow that’s name of the place where I got my tuxedo & 5 shirts (I guess it did not catch you unprepared by now) to wrap up our 110kg (220lb) luggage.
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